Thursday, March 12, 2009

Tucker Max, asshole and still, not quite finished with THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST (70)

Does anyone else know who Tucker Max is? He's a blogger-turned-author who released a book last year entitled I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell.

Read a bit of his bile here.

And he's also a complete and total asshole. I don't know the man-child personally, but I picked up a copy of said book at the airport the other day (I'll be honest, the cover mentioned sex, I was intrigued) and was absolutely disgusted by what lay within. This is East Coast frat-boy shit taken to a new level, a series of missives detailing the truly vile sexual encounters this douchebag has had with a shocking number of women. I'm not one to poo-poo anyone for what they're writing, but the sheer presence, and popularity of Tucker Max and his craptastic brand of blogging.

It angers me first because this sort of hyper-chauvinistic bullshit in this day and age makes me nauseous. As if women in this world need another reason to doubt themselves or their looks or their brilliant minds, but seemingly the good folk at the Hudson Booksellers at Seattle-Tacoma airport believe that the stories of anal sex gone wrong should be up for grabs for any bored idiot perusing their aisles. I've bandied about my fair share of sex-encounters gone wrong in my life, but somehow Tucker Max, even in the short amount of reading I did, dips too deep in to degrading the women he's screwed. It's disrespectful and at least to my very-unsensitive viewpoint, disgusting. Are woman just up in arms about this shit? Does Taylor Max get loogies hocked at him everywhere he goes? I certainly fucking hope so.

On top of that, it pisses me of that this shit ends up in the bookseller of a major airport. The Christian Right spends their whole stupid year trying to get Harry Potter pulled off the shelves, but doesn't seem to mind that their fourteen year old children can read about the time Taylor Max shoved coins in to his sex partner (I totally made that up, but I'm sure there is something similar in this book). Come on! Are we serious here? This is the kind of shit that needs to be pulled from shelves. I'm not advocating censorship, but if the Christian Right is going to be assholes, as they surely will, and they're going to want to fight some ill-intented battled, can it at least be against someone who everyone hates? I wish.

Jesus Christ.

The Last Temptation of Christ (70) is probably going to kill me. I might need to take a full break from Criterion after this film. I can only sit in my crappy leather office chair for so long, drool hanging from my mouth, listening to Willem Dafoe spout off against the moneychangers, the Romans, the old religions, the devil, himself before my head starts to pound. I barely made it through twenty minutes last night before drifting in to a fitful slumber rife with flaming archangels and big-toothed Jesus.

Last night, Jesus was chit-chatting with Neurotic Judas (Harvey Keitel) about dying in Jerusalem and I just assumed that I was nearing the end. Checked the amount of time left on the old film and was shocked to see there was still an hour and a half remaining. The tufts of hair I pulled out in disbelief still litter the floor of my room.

I am going to somehow make it through this movie by the end of the week. I have to. It needs to be ejected from my system. But until then, expect more of this lurching criticism.

Friday: Still, The Last Temptation of Christ (70)


wescoat said...

Man up, bro! If Last Temptation's giving you this much trouble, you're in for a looooong haul!

Anne said...

it sounds like you have a feminist lover. i'm into it.