A truly awkward moment and a wee bit more of THE NIGHT PORTER (59)

Long story short: my lady friend's father is also the man who fixes the plumbing at the coffee shop I work at. Since starting this new found relationship, his status of employment has created an occasional awkward moment.

None so much as yesterday though.

Alex's (the lady friend) father was called in to fix a clog at the coffee shop. This terrified me. Her dad seems nice enough, but regardless, he is the father to the girl I'm sleeping with, I can only imagine he dislikes me on a foundational level. I pace around the shop all day, practicing awkward conversations and sweating abnormally. Finally, at the very end of the day, Alex's Dad arrives. He makes fatherly joking comments about my relationship with his daughter, I choke on my own saliva and try to remember my own name. I pace about trying to seem like I have something to do. It is silent and this is okay, I'm still shocked he even knew who I was.

Then a regular, fully knowledgeable about this entire new situation, enters the store. Said regular customer has been giving me shit about Alex all day, and much of this "shit" is far far far above any sort of "R" rating. The sight of him physically makes me cringe.

Alex's Dad is tucked beneath the sink and I'm wide-eyed trying to figure out some possible way I can inform the regular customer of his presence. Alas, my clenched teeth and curt headshakes did not work and these words spilled from the regular customer's mouth. And remember, the whole time, the father of my lady friend, just feet away:

Regular Customer: So when you moving down to be with your giiirrrrrlllllfriend?
Noah: Hah hah, you're funny.
Regular Customer: Yeah buddy, when's D-Day huh? A day, a week, two weeks ...?
Noah: Oh man regular customer, you are one funny guy.
Regular Customer: Or should we call it V-Day huh? Not D-Day, V-Day ...
Noah: Woooo boy. Yowza, you are funny.
Regular Customer: And by V-Day, I am not referring to Valentine's Day. Let me make that clear, V-Day is not Valentine's Day for Noah and his new lady friend.
Noah: Just stop. Please, just stop.

I have no clue as to what amount of this conversation Alex's Dad heard, or if he noticed that my face was a burning scarlet for the next hour, or if he even cared that a customer had made lewd comments regarding his daughter and I. I just know this, that shit was awkward.

I went out to a show last night, with a flask of whiskey, fully intending to do whatever it took to get through the end of The Night Porter (59). This was a stupid idea. Though the show, and the whiskey, were really quite nice, I was entirely passed out after one frame of the film. To keep this blog Criterion I will describe it: a former Nazi, now a night porter, throws his former ward, and now high society madam, on to the floor - she sprawled in white, he angry in black.

I will finish this movie tonight. For all of our goods.

Friday: The Night Porter (59)